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Drowning in a Sea of Responsibilities
Have you ever felt overwhelmed by life? Have you ever had one of those days--or weeks, or months--where you just couldn't get on top of everything you needed to do? Have you ever felt like you were drowning, or being crushed by the weight of your responsiblities? Of...
Evidence of Conviction
"If you were arrested for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?" As Christians, our lives are supposed to be our witness. In the Gospel of John (13:35), Jesus said to His disciples: "By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if...
I Can See Clearly Now
Remember when I wrote about how much I hated getting so old that now I have to wear glasses? Perhaps you will be surprised to know that I now have five pairs! No, I did not become independently wealthy. Here's what happened. I was really happy with my reading...
The Book Addict Gets Her Fix
We had eleven bookshelves in our last home. Several were floor-to-ceiling and almost all were full. And there were boxes in the garage, and stacks and stacks all over the house. And we were always buying more. The loss of my books was a tragedy of a magnitude I...
Best Laid Plans
This week my life became simultaneously easier and harder. Explain, you ask? Well, over the weekend we acquired a new (to us) car (more on that in a moment). So no longer do I have to drive Teddy to school while John drives Lorelei. Teddy gets to drive himself!...
Bring It On, Lent!
Am I strange because I like Lent? I always have, even when I was a little girl. Back then, we went to Mass every morning at school. I loved the rhythmic way Father Henkel chanted, "Remember, man, thou are dust, to dust thou shall return" over and over and over. I...
A Quarter of a Century
That's how long ago it's been, as of today, that John and I have been a couple. On February 16, 1987, he asked me if I would be interested in going out with him, and I bet if he could have seen the future, he would have run the other way instead. But I guess if any...
It’s Religious Freedom, Stupid
The Catholic Church is supposed to proclaim the truth, not reflect the culture. So IT DOES NOT MATTER if every single Catholic woman in America uses artificial birth control. (They don't, by the way. And that 98% figure that the media is flinging around is . . ....
My Name's Not Mom
Just a mini-rant here . . . does everyone else hate it as much as I do when you are sitting in the pediatrician's office waiting with your kid and the nurse walks in and says, "Are you mom?" I want to scream! I want to say, "No, I am not mom, I am Mrs. Sholly to...
Madonna is AWESOME
I think I may have just discovered a new way to measure the generation gap--just ask your friends what they thought about Madonna's Super Bowl halftime show last night. I don't watch the Super Bowl because I'm not interested in professional football, and I had never...
It's Cake Time in Tennessee . . . or at least in the Sholly house
I have an astonishing number of birthdays to deal with at the beginning of every year. I say *I* have to deal with them because I am the one making the cakes. Sometimes I feel like all I do is bake cakes for six weeks straight. Jake's birthday is January 27, John's...
On Growing Up and Letting Go
"Is this what being an adult is like?" he asks me, fresh from a frustrating 18th-birthday morning spent with his dad at the DMV at the bank, battling bureaucratic bullshit and accomplishing exactly nothing. We look at each other, John and I, and John says, "Pretty...
Am I a Junk Food Junkie?
How many of you remember this song: My husband was listening to a playlist of "one hit wonders" this afternoon while we were working. I don't guess I'd heard that song since it enjoyed its run on...
Bacon Love
I'm supposed to start writing about Diet Rehab today. Instead I am writing about bacon! Do you see a problem here? When I was growing up, there was always a cup of bacon grease in the refrigerator, but the only time I remember my mother using it was when she made...
Music and Memories
Humor me--listen to the song first. I've spent the last couple of hours indulging in a rare occupation for me--listening to music. I don't own an iPod (well, I have an iPhone now but I don't use...
I Want a New Drug
"Junk food is as addictive as cocaine." That's a pretty provocative statement, and it comes straight from the press kit for Diet Rehab, a book by Dr. Mike Dow, the cohost of Freaky Eaters, which would probably impress me if I watched t.v. I don't know yet whether I...
It's a First
I've got the tree undecorated by the end of the Feast of the Epiphany! Yay me! And I did it all by myself, because Emily went back to college yesterday. The tree is still in the house but I'll have it out within the hour. Just waiting for one of my teenagers to help....
Because Truth Matters
Let's get this straight from the very beginning. I'm not planning to vote for Rick Santorum. I disagree profoundly with most of his positions. So the defense that follows has nothing to do with my personal political leanings. It has to do instead with my passion...
Note of Thanks
I've posted variations on this theme on Facebook, in my church bulletin, and in various letters that have gone out to the many communities that helped our family recover from the fire that destroyed our home and belongings four months ago. In case I've missed anyone...
Back to the Grind
So Christmas vacation is over and today it is back to the grind. Back to bath times, bedtimes, and waking up in the dark. Back to rushed mornings and fighting traffic. Back to daily stops at Taco Bell and Weigel's. Back to signing papers and stressing over homework....
Christians Who AREN'T
I'm updating and reposting this today because four years later a U.S. Senator felt it was appropriate, whether joking or not, to "pray" this prayer for our President at the Faith and Freedom conference held on June 9, 2016.So I'm taking my son and his girlfriend to...
2011 in review
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog. Here's an excerpt: The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 18,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would...
Uniformity
For twelve years, I wore a uniform every school day--plaid jumpers, little red ties, knee socks, button downs, penny loafers, kilts--the whole Catholic schoolgirl thing. And I loved it. When I started college, I would panic every morning and wish for my uniform. It...
Fireproof
We use fire as a metaphor for life experience all the time. Garth Brooks sings about "standing outside the fire." At Mass we sing of God strengthening us "like gold that's tested in fire." Only a little while I ago I was writing about the flames of experience,...
The Lord Be With You . . .
And with your spirit! Yesterday was my first chance to experience the new Roman Missal (I was driving Emily back to school post-Thanksgiving last Sunday). You might expect I'd have a lot to say about the new translation, but you'd be wrong. (Oh, I have things to say,...
Christmastime is here . . . NOT!
The rest of Knoxville--the rest of the United States--may think it's time to celebrate the Christmas season, but we Shollys firmly insist on celebrating Advent first. For those who don't know, in the Church calendar, Advent is the season which precedes the Christmas...
Value Vision
This is a SPONSORED post. What does that mean, exactly? It means that I received--for FREE--the item that I am writing about in exchange for posting a review of it here. The good news is that I was going to write a post on this topic anyway, so it's not going to...
Those Conversations You Don’t Want to Have with Your Kids
William (age 10) hit me with a couple of difficult topics right in a row the other night. This post is part one. Many parents struggle with how to talk to their children about where babies come from. When I was growing up, I had many friends whose parents completely...
We were in Alabama over the weekend . . .
. . . but not to watch the big game. 🙁 No, we were in Mobile, at Spring Hill College, to visit Emily, our oldest, for Family Weekend. Emily is a Junior, and some of us have attended the weekend each year, but this time it seemed especially important for us to be...
On Losing Everything Part Three
Of course losing sentimental items is by far the hardest part of a tragedy like ours. Some things really are just things, and can be replaced. The problem with that is that there are so MANY of them, and you don't realize how many and much they cost and how long it...
On Losing Everything Part Two
On the loss of all we owned, someone commented to me, "You unburdened yourselves." True, although not on purpose. A lot of stuff we lost is better off as ashes, probably. I wouldn't have chosen this method of decluttering/downsizing, but it worked. I don't have to...
On Losing Everything
What's so terrible about losing everything (okay, let me just say that there is LOTS that is terrible about losing everything) is that "everything" is too big to grasp or think of or remember all at once. I KNOW I lost everything--every MATERIAL thing--I ever owned,...
Remembering Mima
Today would have been Mima's 93rd birthday. I feel especially melancholy today thinking of all the many treasures related to her that I lost in the fire. You already know about the afghans. But there was so much more. Before Mima moved from the home where she had...
Laundry Laundry Everywhere
Laundry was a big problem for me in what we are now calling "the burned down house" (to distinguish it from "our first house" and "the old house"). In the not-quite-two-years we lived there I never worked out a good system for sorting, washing, and putting away like...
A Sorrow Shared
Friends from school and church have been bringing us several meals each week since the house burned, and even though we have a house now it is still a blessing. I have not had time for a big trip to the store yet, and we don't have any of the staples you need to have...
The Lord Will Provide
My husband was the second reader at Mass today. Of course I always expect to find meaning in the readings or the homily, but hearing John read the following this morning hit eerily close to home: Brothers and sisters: I know how to live in humble circumstances; I...
Traditions
The gifts continue to flow in from so many generous and thoughtful people, from friends and strangers alike. Today I want to share two that touched me especially because of their link to my past. When I was in the first grade, my mother had a Christmas party for me...
Communities
When you are hit with a tragedy, being part of a community is a wonderful thing. In the 20 years we have lived in Knoxville since our marriage, John and I and our five children have become a part of several communities, and all of them have rallied round to provide...
Good-bye, Grandma
The reason no one was home when our house essentially exploded into flames [Labor Day 2011] is that John's grandmother had died just a few days before, and John and I were in Baltimore with our little kids for the funeral, while the big boys hung out with friends and...
The Mills of God Grind Slowly . . .
Knox County Sheriff's Office Investigator Brad Hall called Yolanda Harper and Russell Houser "Good Samaritans." Katie Allison Granju called them predators. who gave her son Henry the drugs that led to his fatal overdose. Knoxville News Sentinel commenters called...
And Justice for All
Lorelei stated rather matter-of-factly the other day that the next time we go out of town, our house will burn down again. And of course I told her that will not happen, that it is very, very rare for a family to suffer such a random, terrible accident. That's one...
Very Good People
Once we received a printed thank you card for a gift we took to a wedding we attended. It said something like, "Words cannot express how much it meant to have you at our wedding. And thank you for your thoughtful gift." I'm not kidding--that was IT! Not even a...
When Irish Eyes Are Smiling . . .
Just look at that smile. That is what I will always remember about Rick Donovan. The father of one of my dearest friends, he died at home on July 25, 2011 of esophageal cancer. I was a frequent visitor at the Donovan home when I was in high school, and I could always...
An Unanswerable Question
Today my six-year-old was crying for her cat, missing since the fire. And she asked me, "Why did God let this happen?" All I could say was the truth: "I don't know. That's one of the things that we won't understand until we die." The other day, someone said to me,...
Good People, Bad People
It has long been one of my convictions that most people are good. I've said it, and I've believed it, and if I hadn't, the outpouring of affection, prayers, support, and gifts we have received since the fire would have convinced me. Gift cards, money, clothes and...
Fahrenheit 451
You know me--the kid who always had her nose in a book. Who grew up to be a bibliomaniac, with bookshelves in every room of the house, stacks of books everywhere that would not fit on the shelves, twenty-something boxes of books that were carted around from house to...
The Flames of Experience
Most of my readers probably know that our home was destroyed by fire a week ago. I know now I really am a writer since I began composing blog posts in my head within a few hours of hearing this unbelievable, sickening, life-changing news. We were not home, which...
Back in the High Life
Drama was my "thing" in high school. I landed a starring role as a freshman and was involved with every production until graduation. I'd been involved in theatre in grade school as well, and at one time was planning on being an actress when I grew up. But I felt...
Home is where the work is
A year and a half ago, I started working at home. Working, as in working at a job, I mean. Every mother is a working mother and my husband always told the kids that I was the hardest working person in our home. But being a wife and mother was my job, and it was the...
And There Was Another Sister . . .
. . . who I really must remember today, because today is her birthday! Sister Mary Albertine is another KCHS grad, from the class of 1947. That means, I suppose, that she is turning 83 today, which is simply impossible to believe if you see her. She has hardly...
Some of the best teachers I ever had . . .
. . . were Sisters of Mercy. And I have a special reason for thinking about them today. My various Catholic Facebook pages inform me that today is the feast of St. Camillus deLellis. Now, I don't know squat about old St. Camillus, but his surname is very familiar to...
Savannah Smiles
For the past umpteen years (twenty, at a guess), we have spent several days in Baltimore every summer. Our very good reason for our faithfulness to Charm City as a vacation spot is that my husband was born there, and that once-a-year trip is usually the only chance...
Vacation, all I ever wanted . . .
We just returned from our summer vacation (more on that later) and I thought I would share some of what has worked for us as a big family (five kids, two parents) planning and paying for and enjoying out-of-town trips. Planning ahead is essential. I can remember...
One Short Life
A year ago today, a young life ended. Today marks the end of the first year that Henry's family spent without him, longing for him on every holiday and birthday, at the birth of his sister and death of his great-grandmother, during family milestones and every day...
Two Little Girls
Do you remember this little video from Sesame Street? It reminds me of me and one of my first best friends, Mary Jo, whom I met when we were about that age--six, to be exact--as first graders at...
Essence de Mai
Doesn't that sound like a good name for a perfume? Too bad God doesn't put the ones he designs into bottles. This one is available only in May, usually in the early morning or late evening hours. The air is cool and the smell outdoors is like nothing else. I just...
Songs of Innocence and of Experience
When I was in college, I opted to pursue an Honors degree in English. Part of the requirement for this was to write a sort of mini-thesis that incorporated some concept that one could trace through several different works and then defend before two professors and a...
Song of Spring
Despite the warm weather, it's gloomy and un-Springlike out my window this morning. Rain is forecast for later and I just hope it holds off until after my kindergartner's much-anticipated field trip to Ijams Nature Center is complete. I'm a big fan of four definite...
Resilience
The yellow house had to go. It really did. It was dangerous. But the wisteria draping it was so beautiful and I was afraid that it would all be gone this year. I started seeing it bloom in other places but not in my yard. And I wondered if I would enjoy that...
St. Joseph Was a Just Man
Today is the Feast of St. Joseph, one of the few saint days I remember from year to year. That's because I spent eight years as a student at St. Joseph School, and we had a special Mass to honor...
Nothing to Do
I think last night was a record for us--we had TEN KIDS in the house overnight, eight of whom were teenage boys! As John and I sat on the front porch I remarked to him that some people might be fazed by such a gathering but as I have so often remarked when people...
From Toddlers to Teenagers
The days when Jake and Teddy were tiny (well, they were never exactly tiny!) are blurred in my mind, probably because it was so hard. They were just over twelve months apart--Jake only learned to walk two weeks before the new baby arrived. The poor little thing--he...
Justice for Henry
I became a fan of Katie Allison Granju at least ten years ago, when she was writing her column "Loco Parentis" in the Metropulse (that's our alternative weekly for my non-Knoxvillian readers.). It was near the back of the paper, I remember, and the first place I...
I'm not the only one . . .
Given my earlier posts about liturgical music, I had to share this, even though it skewers some of my own favorites from the Glory and Praise days.
Twenty Years Ago Today . . .
. . . right about now, actually, I was welcoming my first child into the world. We knew that Emily's birth would require a C-section because she was breech. Although my obstetrician was one of the last left in town who would assist at a vaginal breech delivery, he...
Prescription Addiction
My friend Katie has been writing frequently about the scourge of addiction to prescription drugs since her son died of an overdose and beating in May. And now John and I have been witnessing this almost every day in our work. Our practice is mostly appointed work--a...
It's Leo!
So, I really meant to get back on a regular blogging schedule for the new year, and I was doing pretty well. My last post, however, was January 20, and that's when I got sidetracked. Because late that evening I became an aunt again! This is Leo. Isn't he...
Thoughts of Spring
Back in the dreadful heat of summer I promised that I would never complain about cold this winter. And mostly I haven't. I have enjoyed being cold! I love the snow and I hope we get some more. I am in no way ready for winter to end. However, I do hate grey,...
A Tangled Web
This is a picture of the back of Lorelei's head Monday night before I started attacking her tangles. That whole wad of hair at the end of the ponytail was one giant rat's nest. I have never seen anything like it in my life. Now, I am very fond of baby curls. And I...
Images of the Past
Every morning when I go to my computer for my modern technology fix, my desktop wallpaper reminds me of a very different time, almost 100 years ago. Taken in 1915, in Mobile, Alabama, this four-generation photograph includes (standing, on the right) my great-great...
Martin Luther King and Abortion
This was, I believe, my last column for the East Tennessee Catholic, published right around this time in 2010. Since this is the time of year for participating in Martin Luther King parades and Marches for Life, it seems like a good day to share it with you. Our...
2010 in review
The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here's a high level summary of its overall blog health: The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow. Crunchy numbers A helper monkey made this abstract painting, inspired by your stats. A...
It will grow back
Fourteen years ago, I came home one afternoon to find that my husband had cut off my toddler's curls. Teddy was 22 months old, and when I left the house he had sweet baby curls on his neck. Now he had a big boy haircut. Of course, I started to cry. Not-quite-three...
Bad Songs Revisited
Last time I wrote about bad church music I said there was another song I wanted to write about but I couldn't remember what it was. I knew it wouldn't take long before we sang it again, and sure enough, last week, there it was. I'm sorry, again this is a song that...
Good Morning to You!
I just finished reading Good Morning, Merry Sunshine: A Father's Journal of His Child's First Year, which I picked up at my parish's wonderful monthly Book Swap. The title comes from the father's habit of saying this each morning to his baby girl when he goes to pick...
In the Midst of Life We Are in Death
November is a natural time to reflect on our mortality, when the religious, the secular, and the natural all join to remind us that fleshly existence has an end. The Catholic Church remembers the dead on the feasts of All Saints and All Souls, and many parishes...
I Miss Blogging
Just a quick note to say that I have not run out of topics, only time. One day I will write the story about the unpaid job that ate my life, but not today. I have so much I want to say--I am always composing posts in my head--but I find myself too tired for the...
Embryo Adoption: What Does the Church Say?
The following was one of my last columns for the East Tennessee Catholic. I did a quick check before reprinting it here to make sure that it still accurately reflects the Church's position on this issue. Most of the mail attorneys receive is dry and uninteresting, as...
PayBox
PayBox. I encourage you to check this out. It's a new payment system similar to PayPal except that it will be trading its own currency. You can read more about it at the link if you are interested. They are recruiting early bird users right now to test the system...
Morning Walk
How lucky am I to be able to take a morning walk in my own back yard and see the following scenes: And what drew me out into the yard so early in the first place? THREE DEER, whom I watched from my bedroom window while they grazed. It was a good start to the day....
Random
Just for fun . . . random pictures from around our house this weekend.
Henry's Story
I've written a lot over the past few months about the tragic early death of Henry Louis Granju. That story is now going to be told on television. If you aren't local (or, like me, don't have t.v. in your home--yeah, right!), you will be able to watch it online after...
Of Mysteries and Bodice Rippers
Today I am re-reading "A Tangled Web," the sequel to the more-famous "Deceptions" by Judith Michaels (if you haven't read it you may remember the t.v. adaptation which starred Stefanie Powers). Since I am thinking so much about Mima today, I remembered that my copy...
Mary Elizabeth Higgins Carroll, 1918-2008
I was blessed with the obligation and opportunity to write Mima's obituary, which follows. Mary Elizabeth Higgins Carroll, age 89, died January 30 at her home. She was a member of Immaculate Conception Catholic Church for over 50 years. Elizabeth was born to the...
Happy Birthday, Mima
Today would have been my maternal grandmother's 99th birthday. She died in January 2008. The following was the column I wrote immediately following her death. When I tell people about this column, I say I write about “life issues.” But that means that necessarily I...
Back in the Day
My post about my trusty Dodge Durango, and whether my teenagers were embarrassed about riding in it, got me thinking about my own years at Knoxville Catholic High School. It's true these days that not only does every student old enough to drive seem to have their own...
On the Road Again
Back in June, John had a wreck while driving my car. For once, it was not his fault (he is kind of famous for rear-end collisions, unfortunately). But the other party disputes his version of events, and it looks like a lawsuit may be necessary (why, you may ask, has...
Acts of Kindness
Tomorrow is Henry's 19th birthday. His Aunt Betsy has a wonderful idea to help the family commemorate it. Go check it out.
What Really Makes a Writer?
I was a "writer" long before I could put pen to paper to form legible words. I remember dictating stories to my mother when I was about four, and illustrating them afterwards. "The Girl with the Hat" was my first composition; I believe my mother has it tucked away...
Making Believe
Feeling tired and looking for inspiration, I turned to the box of un-albumed pictures (15 years' worth) next to my desk and pulled out this one: Here sits King William, at the age of four, with his boppy pillow and ever-present royal purple towel, treasures arrayed...
The More Things Change
When I was in high school, my parents let me go up to a friend's cabin on the lake for the weekend. Four 17 year old girls, we drove to Watts Bar all by ourselves and set up housekeeping. We built a fire and set up our lawn chairs around it and played charades. I...
Poetry Blogging: The New Colossus
I only have part of this one by heart. Reading the whole thing brings tears to my eyes. Not just because of the moving lines, either, but because I don't think most Americans today share these sentiments. The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus Not like the brazen giant of...
Why My Kids Aren't Allowed to Drive
Long before we had teenagers, my husband and I reached a momentous, counter-cultural decision: our kids were not going to be anxiously waiting in line at the DMV to get their licenses on their 16th birthdays. Our kids were not going to be allowed to get their...
Poetry Blogging: Equipment
I'm sharing the following poetry excerpt today which I borrowed from my friend Ikisha's Facebook. She says an elementary teacher had her class memorize it years ago. Entitled "Equipment," and composed by Edgar A. Guest, it was George Washington Carver's favorite...
Memorable Messes
Today on Facebook, Mothering Magazine asked readers to comment on the worst messes their kids ever made. Now, my kids make messes daily but I knew immediately that the worst one ever had been made--of course--by Jake and Teddy when they were toddlers. It was right...
I'm Tired of Being a Human Doing
"Take time just to be; remember, you are a human being, not a human doing." I think I clipped it out of a Reader's Digest long ago, and for years it hung inside the kitchen cabinet of my first house, along with similar uplifting sentiments: "Enjoy the little things,...
What is Fair?
So the other day a friend posted this link on Facebook and I thought it was really interesting. It was a talk about some of the differences between liberals and conservatives, and one of the differences was what value each group places on fairness. I was telling John...
Liturgical Music Redux: Bad Songs
You know, I think this blog is really good for me, because I get things off my chest here and then I don't have to rant about them in real life anymore. And I also think that's why (aside from getting busy with the start of school) I lost steam on my Liturgical Music...
Lifelong Marriage: Not for the Faint of Heart
The other day I was talking to my Aunt Joan and she mentioned that she and Uncle Jack will be married 60 years in December. "I think we're going to last," she said. She was only 16 when they married and conventional wisdom wouldn't have given them much of a chance. ...
TV Is Not for Me
In some class way back in high school, the teacher conducted a survey of the number of television sets each family possessed. I remember feeling quite proud that my family had the most: five--one in the den and one in every bedroom. One of my classmates had...
